oh man.
i haven been blogging for quite some time already lah.

thursday
i was super dumb lah.
i was so panicky about my dnt work that i left the house without wearing my contact lenses.
i only realise that when i was at my house downstairs.

school time was boring as usual lah.
ss cannot sms at all.
mrs cross was sitting behind me.
and the lesson of mrs w___ was super ultra boring.
i was trying my best not to sleep.

didn't do anything during dnt.
mr l__ just teach us and talk about structure lors.
cause there was 4 absentees.
since left so little people, i also dunno teach was lah.

after recess was 3 periods of poa.
copied notes.
slack slack.
yay. 3 periods gone.

then was physics lesson.
mdm c____ came to our class to "observe" my class.
damn woman.
make me cannot go sleep.
i was really about to fall asleep during the first period while mr s__ was teaching.
i was "enlightened" dring the second period.
mr leong made me wake by taking zara's 6b pencil and write on my paper.
i had to erase everything.
then he took the pencil away and go wite on other people's paper.
-.-

did nothing much during maths.

after school went to princess to watch mr beab's holiday with sen, qi, jie, yan
something happened on our way there.

after the movie clarence and jessie came down to slack slack with us at princess's mac.
after that we took 28.
clar alighted at 201
jie alighted at his hse there.
jessie and i took till interchange.
andrew send me home.

FRIDAY
meet sengie at 12 plus.
walked around.
bought mini toons sweets.
after that we meet clar, jie and lennie at mrt station.
for once, lena was late.

when we were at the kallag station alrdy,
jiaqi called and told me she can go.
i was like -.-

when we reached plaza singapura,
the tickets for The Number 23 was selling fast.
i used sengie's and lena's e65 and go internet.
hahas.
go see which other threatre to watch.
meanwhile, ask jiaqi to faster come down.
supposingly, vivocity supposed to have.
but when we went down, they say totally sold out already.
wtf?

ended up,
we went to superdog to eat hotdogs.
-.-
i didn't eat.
cause i see the hotdog got alot of tomatoes then i don't wanna eat already.

after that, lena went to find her parents.
the rest of us went to take mrt.
all of us pei sengie alight at bedok.
then we took 28 to jiewei's house.
sengie went home.

jan went to jiewei's house also.
go play mahjong.
had duck rice for dinner.

play until halfway, jiaqi took over my place and play.
for all the times i went to jiwei's house, i always lose.
but jiaqi play only, she win!!!
RAWR!

eneded up, i'm the only one who never WIN at all.
rawr to jiaqi.
went home at 10 plus plus.
we passed by jasmine jiejie house downstairs.
then they keep on disturb me about cockroaches.
then afterthat, really got cockroach come out.
den i wanna run away, clarence dun wan let me run away.
RAWR!.

after that went to the bus stop.
pei clar wait for bus cause his 38 just left.
how sway -.-

reached home at 11.15

SATURDAY
some dumb woman called me early in the morning.
disturb my sleep only.
zzz.

went to mac and meet her.
saw someone else there too.

went there and actually, i didn't study at all.
jan came down too.
we slack slack.
then later that time then we talked about the chalet.
after that went home already.

everytime i decide to let go, something always has to come back and remind me. just how much i cared.

argh.
i just suddenly feel very fan now lors.
about lors of stuffs that i dun even know how to say.
i just wish everything will last. friendship, relationship as well as sisterhood.

well.
many things are happening recently.
but.. whatever lah.
i'm pissed off enough already.

MONDAY
had lessons as usual.
first 4 periods was english and ace.
chinese had test.
don't know how to do lah.
just anyhow do.

afetr that was ss.
it was surprising that i passed my ss test.
then we were released early cause of sl duties.

took 222 there.
sengie and i went to change into sl shirts.
had duty.
blah blah.
was very thirsty.
i was super dumb.
i was having gastrics and i still bought 100plus.

after sl went to kfc to eat with sen, shan, qi, clar, jie.
after that me, shan, jie and jan accompany clar to whitesands buy mouse.
after that we went back to tamp.
took 17.
some dumb boys behind was super noisy.
some people were attituding.
and they look scary):

then jan go ask those boys to talk softer.
say that they very noisy.

after we reach tecc.
clar and jie bought mac to eat.
i slacked there only.
went home at 8 plus.

TUESDAY
hmms.
today geo was okays.
chinese was quite funny larhs.
jiewei very funny.
yiyan very cute.
me and yiyan were talking bout stuffs.
jie was copying answers from others to let us copy(:

yan and i were having small talks.
were talking about it halfway.
then jiewei say.
"wahlao! i treat you so good. then got this kind of small talk then you leave me out. good lor"
hahas.
i told him after that.
dumb jiejie.

after recess was crap.
sucky hell.

after school took 18 with shan.
went to s11 there and makan.
after that went home and bath.
then go down mac again.

meet clar and jie also.
clar was sweating like he just bathed. you better drink more water lah..
hahas.
after that we went in mac.
clar went home soon after.
jie went home at 7.
shan and i stayed until 8 plus.
then we still chitchat at her house downstairs.
talked about really alot of things that is happening recently lors.

shall stop here for now.
my brother come back only then kpkb.
andand.
tmr got sl duty again.
i hope i don't get another headache and gastric again.
but got early release from lessons.
hahas.
so happy(:

gtg.
bye.

lalalas..
i'm now at tecc the mac with jiejie and shan.
clar went back be his guai kia.
go for his dumb tuition.

jiejie was forcing shan to eat fries.
so mean of him.
shan said she can't eat"fry food"
wow!
then her french fries became..
"french fry"
wow!

interesting words.
i swear i won't use them in my compo.
if not comfirm fail.
(:

shan just poked me because of it.
bleh-!
here comes again..
jiejie helps me(:
how nice of him.
he is asking shan not to cry.
bleh-!
like she will cry like that.
i'm saying she is strong okays!
then she gives me that dumb cheeky smile=S
then she beat me for nothing.
wow!

then there are some dumb kids in mac.
most likely sec 1[s] larhs.
blasting music.
quite dumb larhs.

then there is a group of dumb girls from chongzheng primary staring at one another.
so lame.
wow.
i see a tortoise with them.
it must be suffering now.
cause the poor little tortoise have to see those dumb girls eat their french fries.
-.-
jiejie.. at least i'm smarter than them.
i dun mistreat the tortoise like them.
not like janus.
make until my tortoise wan to do "fen sheng shu"
jiaqi baoshan doesn't understand the meaning of that.
she is dumb.

lalalas.
poke again.
all that dumb baoshan knows is to poke people.
no creativity.

wow.
primary kids are reading teenage.

shall end now.
bye.

wah sian sian..
so boring.
now at mac with sengie.
waiting for janus to come down as well.
got nothing to do.

brought the laptop out..
wanted to do chinese de.
but i don't know why i'm not doing.
maybe i'm just too bored.
zzz.

wah sian.
many things happened these few days.
many things to blog.
BUT!
i just saw something just now and it totally ruin my mood.

thats my handphone bill.
wahlaos!
i also don't know why it overshot.
it was NOT supposed to overshot.
and even if it really did, it should be lesser than last month.
BUT! the damn bill came and it was $60 over dollars.
i only saw the back page.
i couldn't find the front page.

how am i gonna survive without my phone?!
wah sian!

people.. don't call or msg my phone.
if there is anything to tell me, call my hse fone.

I never meant the things I said

To make you cry

Can I say I'm sorry

It's hard to forget

And yes I regret

All these mistakes

I don't know why you're leaving Me

But I know you must have your reasons

There's tears in your eyes

I watch as you cry

But it's getting late

Was I invading in on your secrets

Was I too close for comfort

You're pushing me out

When I'm wanting in

What was I just about to discover

When I got too close for comfort

Driving you home

Guess I'll never know

Remember when we scratched our names into the sand

And told me you loved me

But now that I find

That you've changed your mind

I'm lost for words

And everything I feel for you

I wrote down on one piece of paper

The one in your hand

You won't understand

How much it hurts to let you go

Was I invading in on your secrets

Was I too close for comfort

You're pushing me out

When I'm wanting in

What was I just about to discover

I got too close for comfort

Driving you home

Guess I'll never know

All this time you've been telling me lies

Hidden in bags that are under your eyes

And when I asked you I knew I was right

But if you turn your back on me now

When I need you most

But you chose to let me down

Won't you think about what you're about to do to me

And back down...

Was I invading in on your secrets

Was I too close for comfort

You're pushing me out

When I'm wanting in

What was I just about to discover

I got too close for comfort

You're pushing me out

When I'm wanting in

(Yeh yeh yeh)

What was I just about to discover

When I got too close for comfort

Driving you home

I guess I'll never know

does anyone realise how disappointed i am?
i don't know what's with all these things that are happening around me.
well, this is the longest time that we "quarrelled" right?
there hasn't been anytime that is longer than this.

i know that i was at wrong for neglecting you.
now i regret it can?
i doubt anyone understands how i feel at all.
i feel so terrible inside.
even so, can you not always ask me to go to him instead?
so is this the punishment that you are giving me?
the punishment for neglecting you.
i almost wished that you could understand how i feel.
i almost wished that you could forgive me.
i almost wished that you knew.

wished you knew that i doted on you.
wished you knew how much you mean to me.
wished you knew nothing and no one replace you.
wished you knew i will never break the promise.

why can't i go to you instead?
so the answer is because he already dotes on me.
and do u really no longer don't dote on me anymore?
i don't wanna guess or hear lies anymore.
i wan you to say it right in my face. but i'm afraid that might not be able to take it.
why can't we go back to how we used to be like?
why can't we?
so, this is how fragile we are?

know what she told me about it?
she told me i was jealous.jealous of you and the Her.
know what she told me about too?
she told me you are jealous too. jealous of me and him being too close.
thats what she thinks.
so, what are you actually thinking?
i want to hear you say them.

if you wanna know mine, fine.
i would dare to say that, i'm jealous of her.
i don't know why.
so, what about you?
do you have any freaking idea that, just a phrase from you.
and it can inflict many scars? i doubt you know that.

why don't you tell me everything? everything that is bothering us now. maybe not us. just me.
perhaps it isn't even affecting you in any way.

okays.
didn't blog again.
so.. i shall blog now.

monday
it was raining super heavily in the morning.
had to run to school.
too bad, my uniform got all wet.
quite a number of people also.
hahas.
but! i sit under the damn fan in class!
sobsob.
so cold.

after school went to kfc with sengie and shan.
sen and i kopped straws from kfc until we emptied 2 containers.
okays. actually, it's sengie. not me.
i'm innocent.
saw heather and lynn in kfc.
they were watching us laughing away i think.
nevermind.

we went tm after that.
sengie went to collect things.
after that shan and i sent sen to take 67
after that walked to tecc.
talked to shan about alot of things.
these things that have been haunting me for so long.

saw brenda and zara there.
clarence and jessie came to find us after that.
slacked for awhile before going home.
we saw a damn bat.
so we decided to take an alternate route.
hahas.

had a pretty high fever in the night.
and my head hurts like hell.

tuesday
thats today.
my head is spinning and spinning..
lalalas~

after school slacked at 3a2 for quite sometime with shan, clar and jie.
after that went to the bb court near yanyan hse.
before that we went to makan at tampines mart.
it has been super long since i went there okays.

went there after that.
jan arrived soon after that.
they played basketball while me and jessie talked.
then after that they started playing with 2 other guys and RON TAN!

okays.
i am scared of the damn ball coming towards me.
i have always scared.
yet they play until can dribble right infront of me.
RAWR!

pretty scary.
well.
clarence got scratched on his hand.
o.O

after that, we took 291.
went to buy yiyan's prepaid card for him.
i'm a nice sister okays!
otherwise i would have gone home straight, especially when i'm on the damn bus 291.
RAWR!

wanted to pass yan the ppc since he say they were gonna be released soon.
so i waited for awhile.
after that decided to go home already.
jiaqi called me right after i stepped into the house door.
-.-

well.
thats all for today bahs.

actually, i'm having a damn headache again.

tmr gonna have meeting for sec3s.
zzz.
i think i'm gonna go home and sleep after that bahs.
hahas!

yawns!

and i can't stop thinking about what's going on..

oh..
quite some time never blog already lar.
hmms..

WEDNESDAY
i didn't go for the dnt course after school(:
sen,me, qi, lennie, jan, clar, yiyan and ryan took 67 to tampines interchange.
talk about stuffs on the way.
while i pei sengie go nokia care to repair her phone,
the rest went to find space at mac.
settled for the big mac at the interchange.

we talked alot of crap.
they were supposed to have amaths tuition with yiyan de.
ended up yiyan and ryan went home earlier.
clar, qi, lennie and me were talking about perverted XXX stuffs at mac.
while jan and sen were folding hearts.

childrens nowadays arhs.
talk about this kind of things like nobody's business.
we just said everything out. dun care what other people thinks.
we were there laughing until peng.
then jiaqi was doing something that was super obscene.
then i keep on laughing.
then i told clar and lennie.
then they started laughing also.
jiaqi was alittle bit slow.
hahas!

after that pei lena go cs.
then we walked around.
we went 'toys r us' also.
the first thing that they played with was the soft toys.
they placed to toys in the ahem ahem positions.
jan was running around when he knocked into a woman.
it reminds me of the flying ah ma by clar.
lols.

lena was reading her comic.
super engrossed.
then clar and jiaqi started fighting with the piyo piyo hammer.
chasing around each other in the shop.
it is really super embarrassing lors.

after that then i send jiaqi off.
sengie went to pierce another ear hole.
went home after that.
it was raining heavily.

THURSDAY
went to eat at kfc with jiewei, sengie, lena and jessie.
janus came later and we went to jiewei's house.
it was raining heavily.
i got bullied on the bus by janus and jiewei.
mean people.
they threatened me with my phone.
aw..
reached jiewei's house.
obviously didn't do chinese work larhs.

after awhile clarence came.
i didn't know he was coming.
i got bullied by them again.
cause they took my phone again.

this time, they on the song.
then clarence put inside his pe pants.
please lors.
he was wearing long pants.
but he go put inside his pe pants okays!
den he sit down!
ahh!
my phone! my speaker!
after awhile, we went to play mahjong.
starting is clarence keep on losing money.
then play halfway then they realised that they count wrong tai.
play play play until 8.30.

in the end, i lost the most.
jiewei won the most.
most of the time is jiewei and janus win.
zzz.
after that we walked to the bus stop with is pretty near my house.
then clar took 38 home, jessie took 8 home.
jan pei me walk home.

FIRDAY
hmms.
after school went mac with jan, sen, qi and jiejie.
kopped alot of straws(:
sengie keep on smiling to herself.
it makes me and jiaqi want to go crazy.
lalalas.
at about 2.45 jan and jiejie went back school.
sen, qi and me left at 3.
took 67.
sengie can't stop smiling.
jiaqi went home.
sengie and i went tm.
went popular.
looked at things.
then sengie bought things.

after that then i went home already.
but at around 8 plus.
clarence called.
ask me go down tecc slack.
so i agreed lors.
since jiaqi asked me before that too.
got nagged by my mother for that.
cause of stuffs larhs. went down to tecc.
can't find clar and jan at mac.
then i decided to go to the bb court and see see.
they are really there.
they all play until very sweaty lors.
jiaqi came down soon after that too.

janus and clarence used my shirt and wipe their sweat.
then i was like wth?
nevermind.
we went in mac after that.
cause they really sweat until alot.
so thought go inside and cool down.
clarence go and put his shirt on me!
it is so dirty!

after awhile. we saw yanyan!
oh.. our dear yiyan.
lols!
chatted for awhile.
then we went to the bus stop.
clar and qi crossed the bridge to go home.
jan, yan and i slacked at the bus stop for awhile looking at people opposite.
after that they 2 send me to my house downstairs.
cause i need to go home already.

SATURDAY
thats today. did practically nothing.
i woke up at 6.05 then i suddenly remembered that it's saturday.
so went back to sleep.
sleep until 12 plus.
woke up and slack.
then watched 'JUST MY LUCK'
quite lame lar.

slack slack slack.
and i like got alot of homework to do lehs.
sian diao. i think tmr going white sands buy things. anyone wanna go???
and then i think after that i will go tecc find my dearest jiaqi(: and yanyan of course!


some people sound so cute when they are sleeping.
i'm gonna see you sleep one day.
lalalas~
RAWR!

i don't know why..
but i have been feeling very sleepy these few days.
and i will feel like sleeping very often.
even though i'm sleeping earlier now, compared to last time.

wonder how am i gonna ton council camp at this rate..
hais.
and i often feel like crying nowadays.
cause of all these things happening around me.
hais..

oh man..
i got a feeling that i made someone angry today.
but the person says never..
don't really believe though.
nevertheless, still sorry okays?
i promise you that i will take out the straws the next time you ask me okays?
sorry la..
and then, i feel so guilty again when i keep dragging time when you wanna go home..
ended up with such a heavy rain..
you look so angry again..
dui bu qi again!

i feel so damn horrible today.
hais.
First was making people angry..
next is neglecting people..
then, next is.. argh. don't wanna talk about it.
i only know that i wanted to cry out a few times in school today..
i just suddenly feel like crying it all out.
but the more things i keep to myself, the more problems come along.

我没想到我们之间真的那么经不起考验。
我知道这所有的一切都是我的错。
我们已经不者么好了，加上这一次吵架，我不知道会发生什么。
但我想要你知道，我真的真的真的不想放手。
可是，如果你真的真的真的真的很想要离开。
我想我也不懂得要这么阻止你。
我也没有权力阻止你。
所以我想我会让你走，我会学会懂得放手。
毕竟我会想要我哥哥开心。
但其实我真的不想要你离开我。
算我自私吧，我无所谓。

call me selfish,
i know i'm.
i have been one, all along.

i wish i can just tell you this straight in your face.
i don't want things to turn out this way.
i feel so horrible.
i know it's all my fault that things turn out like this.

i don't know how to ask for your forgiveness.
so can you tell me..
tell me what i must do in order for me to get your forgiveness?
wo zhen de bu zhi dao ying gai yao ze me yang cai ke yi de dao ni de yuan liang?

tell me that it's not over.

okay..

it has been pretty long since i uploaded pics here uh..

so i shall just upload afew today.

13 jan: at starbucks slacking(:

21feb: lena tries to bite me): aww!

4th mar: celebrate da jie and weiquan's birthday(:

23feb: original slice of cake (mine)

23feb: cake after one bite (sengie)

23feb: cake halfway eaten (jessie)

23feb: cake finishing (jiaqi!)

5th mar: jiejie outside bedok interchange

5th mar: jan.sen.yan

5th mar: yan.jan

21th feb: lena's birthday cake(:

6th mar: shan.jie.sen at kfc

6th mar: the retarded faces =S

6th mar: sen.jie

12th mar: me &sen at marina kbox.

12th mar: bleh! xP

12th mar: bugs bunny tooth(:

10th mar: these roses to pray to you.

10th mar: roland restaurant.

14th mar: high class sharks' fin"

lols..

more to come in the future.

(:

hmms..
didn't really have a good sleep last night.
thanks to the headache and the flu.

okay..
i woke up at 7am this morning.
thats miracle.
talked to clar for awhile before he went for his chinese tuition.
after that went to watch hana kimi.
i'm still so far behind.
what the hell.

okays.
meet clar at2o1.
went over to jieweijiejie house.
supposed to do chinese.
but...
they ended up playing dota.
and i ended up talking to jiaqi on the phone.
but janus and clarence took away the phone.
they refused to return me.
aww..

i began screaming and shouting for jiaqi.
tried to go over janus's side to get the phone back but failed terribly.
cause clarence dun wan let me go over.
sad larh.

they only returned me my phone after 30mins.
but as soon as jiaqi call back again they took away the phone.
what the hell!
i began screaming and shouting again.
until finally they returned me my phone.
so i went next door and talk to jiaqi.
my headache and fever came back again.
zzz..
clarence keep on come over and make those obscene sounds to jiaqi.
damn dumb.

after that we ordered mac.
yiyan suddenly came out of the room with the scooter.
super funny.
i mean.. where people use the scooter around the whole house one?
after the mac delivery came, ate.
and baoshan came over.
we slacked for awhile.

clarence, jiewei and me went to the kitchen to open red wine.
after that we went to play mahjong!
after playing 1 round, see them play 1 round.
then i went down and fetch jiaqi.
jiewei accompanied me down.

came up and watch them play for 2 rounds.
then i played also.
i won 2 rounds.
hahas..
was super hyper.
but 1 of them was zha hu!
ahhh... wth.
nevermind.
heng never play money.
yiyan left earlier than us..
T.T

after playing then we left jiewei's house.
janus, clarence, me and jiaqi sent baoshan home.
then after that we went to have our dinner at kfc.
the food is like uncooked lors.

after the 3 of them finish eating, they started playing.
i was super jialat.
cause i haven finish eating.
and what they did was argh.
it can ruin your appetite.

this is what they did..


would you like to taste it?
"high class sharks' fin"
consists of:
1. lots of chilli sauce
2. ice
3. a little ice lemon tea
4. lemon
5. tissue paper
6. straw
7. vegetables.
8. water
9. cheese

disgusting right?
initially it looked like sharks' fin.
clarence said that.
after they added certain things inside.
it looks totally....
nevermind.

they actually shake it alot of time u know!
they close the cover,
use serviettes to hold the things and shake.

we quickly run away after the cleaner wanna come and clean.
lols.
to prevent a repetition of what happen at macdonalds.

after that then we went home already.
sian-ed.
and.. we didn't do the chinese at all.

talked on the phone with jiaqi until 1am.
then she went to sleep.
i after to sleep soon after that.

oh..
i'm oh-so-sickly now..

had a headache when i woke up this morning.
but i thought nothing of it.

when down for lunch with jasmine and jason.
after that went to the void deck nearby play badminton cause it was raining outside.
after awhile we decided to go to the outdoor court to play.
it wasn't raining already.

after we played for about 5mins,
it started to drizzle and the sun was shinning brightly.
we were thinking since already get wet abit already.
then might as well just play larh.

but after we finish playing then we slack slack abit.
then i started to get headache again.
a super ultra pain one.
then my forhead and neck and body very hot, but my hands and legs super cold.
jasmine treated us drink.
cause she lost the game.
not badminton larh.

after the drink we went home.
supposed to go home and bath then meet again.
but my whole body just feels so weak, and i'm having a freaking headache and fever.
so i'm just gonna stay at home and be guai hai zi.

don't ask me why i can still use the computer.
i was because got things to do.
:(( i'm sick.

i wish i can just fucking hell die now.
we are already not as close as before.
looks like the arguement will only make things worser than ever.
hais.

and i fucking hate myself now.
and i realise it's all my fault.

i wasn't there when you needed me,
i encouraged you to like him back. cause i thought he would be better than the other guy.
never did i expect such things to happen too.
maybe i shouldn't say a thing.

it's all my fault that i can't make out what you are thinking.
i didn't know you are so tired of it.
no.
i didn't know you are really so sick and tired of it.
i admit that i was in the wrong for scolding you.
but i don't mean a single thing.

i know it's all my fault.
i attitude you, but it became your fault.
i'm sorry.
you forget what to say, it become your fault.
i'm sorry.
i ask you go msg just cause u typed a msg, it become your fault.
i'm sorry.

i don't even mean what i said to you yesterday.
what wrong with me man.
so, i know it all now.
it all should be my fault to start with.
it shouldn't even be anyone else's fault.

you want me to tell you.
you say i'm unhappy.
and since thats the case, i should tell you.
but have you thought why is it that i'm unhappy?
cause i think i need you.
so can you fucking hell stop letting go?
why can't it be how it used to be?

i spent the whole night thinking and
fell asleep with these tears on my cheeks.
i realised.
i don't have an answer to anything.
i don't know what to do.
i'm totally lost.

so..
can you tell me what you wanna do?
if you really wanna leave.
if that's really what you want to do,
just tell me.
i won't be as cruel to hold you back.
but all i can do is to HOPE that you wouldn't leave.

don't leave. cause i know very well that i need you..

i jus remembered what happened yesterday night.
i was on the phone with clarence.
and i got fooled by him for 15 times.

i told him..
i shall try not to scold any vulgarities.
and he started trying to catch me scolding.
zzz.

and.. i got fooled by him by huh-ing.
he made me huh many many times.
longest record, *31 huhs.

meanass.
-.-

eventually, i told him, i'm not gonna try not to scold vulgarities already.
it's difficult.
cause i keep saying what the fuck?
zzz..