okay.
i'm back from camp.
because of the camp, i cannot go and see my wuzun at tm.
he was so near yet so far.

BUT
before going to the camp,
i didn't feel like going.
but after it all finally ended.
i realised that i don't wanna leave the campsite.
not because of being able to miss school.
but the instructors are really nice people.
other than a few that was kinda kaopei

DAY 1
met our instructors.
they are YANA and DUMDUM
had to walk to changi camp site from school.
and the distance is 8-9 km.
we took about 3 hours to walk there.
the journey was kinda long.
but the instructors were fun people so it was okay lar.
did lots of cheer along the way.

i expected myself to be kinda dead when we reach the campsite.
but i found myself quite awake.
had lunch then crapped around.
i'm sleeping in different dorm from the rest of them.
only with baoshan:)

after that we did improvised rafting.
not really very fun tough.
simply because the wave was very strong, so we couldn't do much.

next up was kayaking.
expected it to be ok ok nia.
but it turned out fun.
the KI also very cute. :)
the whole class had to come together at the middle of the sea.
then those sitting behind had to stand up.
it was okay.
but when it was time for the front people to stand up, the boat became unstable.
cause got no support on the front.

lay han and i fell into the water cause we were pushed around.
then became unstable and fell.
but it was fun to be into the water.
nice feeling.

we then went to shower cause we were filled with sand after coming out from the water.
the water was super sandy.
my shoes was filled with sand. :S

had dinner.
then did some sing alongs outside the dining hall.
very funny.
dumdum and shasha so damn gay.
hahas.

after which was the blind man's trail.
it teaches us to listen to the small voices within us.

soon after was bed time.
wake up very early.
was supposed to report by 6.20
can at least sleep until 5.30 man.
but i woke up at 4.50 thanks to people who wake up and start chatting and chatting.

DAY 2
oh.
the day morning and afternoon was total crap.
thanks to some people who are like trying to have racial descrimination.
keep on talking and talking malay.
makes me super dulan lors.
fucking idiots.

had orienteering.
super boring. cause it was boss who was talking.
practically i was sleeping. zzz.

also had to come out with a dance for a song.
they chose the step up song.
syaza taught the steps.
then some people seem to come from malaysia and even bangala language.
keep talking her own language.
fucking nahbei cheebye lar. guai lan kia.

couldn't really concentrate on the dance steps either.
too pissed to listen.
fucked up.

had abseil, lunch, CRC, zipline+ general stations.
got my hand the skin got "burnt" & scratched.
instructor sky says it was pretty serious.
he's one cute guy man.
super joker.
he makes your mood better especially in the simpliest way.

only later then my mood changed for the better.
got better and finally learned the steps.

campfire was nice.
3a2 was first to perform,
followed by 3t8, 3e4, 3e5, 3a1, 3e6, 3e3 then 3e7

i like 3a2's cheer.
i like 3e5's skid.
damn funny lah.

clarence and justin was sitting beside me during campfire.
so we were crapping around.
damn funny.
my mood was very high.

then it was supper time.
had curry puff.
then went up to the guys dorm.
took mentos from clarence.
and i didnt know that girls are actually not allowed to go up boys dorm.
when caught by mr ow, goes for detention.
whatever.

i went when he was downstairs.
and he should be able to see me.
hahas.

went to under dorm G with clarence for debriefing.
awww.
went to 3e6's dorm with zara after the lights were out.
hahas.
had problems going back.

DAY 3
oh gosh.
i wake up many times.
thanks to the damn aeroplane.
it was flying super low.
much lower then the day before.
after waking up, packed up most of the stuffs.

went down for breakfast.
the last meal we are having there.
after that had to get our bags down.

next was cleaning up.
had to clean up the instructor's toilet.
expected it to be pretty okay but wasn't what we expected.
there were mosquitos stick on the basin.
some and dead, a few weren't.

when we finshed cleaning up, we wrote a note and all of us signed and gave it to dumdum and yana.
it was our class cheer.
all of us then had some sing along sessions with shasha.
it was the last time we are doing cheers in the camp.
already started to miss the instructor already.

we were then told to come out by dumdum and yana.
yana cried cause she was so touched.
looking at her cry, we all also wanna cry liaos.
i also man.
seriously very sad.
at first i didn't cry.
but cried after that.

the whole class took a picture as a whole with yana and dumdum.
we hugged yana.
then we were crying.
cause we really like her and dumdum.
they were like the best instructors.

then we had to board the bus liao.
yana and dumdum send us off at the bus there.
seriously missing them.
don't feel like leaving there at all lors.

majority cried.
yana cried when she waved us goodbye.


no wonder they say sec3 camp leaves a very deep memory on us.
now i know why.
lalalas.

reached school hear ow talk crap.
then home teachers are to send us to the gate.
oh so lame!
sen and i went back.
go find sijie to get our phones.

went to mac with jiewei, yiyan, sengie, baoshan &jiaqi.
hahas.
crapped and talked about the camp man.
then we did some of the claps in there also.
hahas.
heck care.
thats what we are when we are together.
not afraid of malu-ation.

after that baoshan, jiaqi & me send jiewei back school.
nicholas, james, shaun, peiyun & yanpeng was with us also but they also going back school.
yiyan send sengie.
then we meet up with him again.
hahas.

later split ways again.
yiyan take mrt, me & shan+shaun take 18.
they alighted at holy trinity there.
i went back on my own.

so damn tired.
whole body aching.
anf having a headache.
the headache started since the night before.
whatever.

i'm off to sleep.
i'm sleepy.
missed my phone for 2 and a half days.
aww.

byee~

one dumdum clap.
*claP* ROCK!

i'm boredddd.

was woken up this morning by korkor.
he was beside me saying.
"qi lai lo!"
saying and say..
until i wake up.
hahas.
cute idiot.

i was sitting on the bed then daddy came to my room and looked very angry.
he threw 2nd bro de phone bill to him.
cause overshot.
shit lar.
mine i think also over lors.
so long le the bill still haven come.
what the hell.

after that mummy, daddy and both korkor[s] went out.
i'm the only guai one.
stayed at home.
chit chat on the phone with jiaqi.
hahas.

slacked around.
did practically nothing when i'm supposed to do homework.
lazy lar.
so gay.
watched zhong ji yi ban.

slack slack slack.
i dun feel like going the camp lors.
it doesn't seem to interest me at all..
so i haven pack a thing.
yay.

whatever.
byee.

do you know how freakin guilty i was today?
i don't feel good after scolding you either.
saying sorry doesn't even seem to help abit.
do you know know that, i was so guilty till i felt like crying?

things happened.
and i hope that you will be there for me.
but you don't even seem to care.

why do you feel like i'm not telling you anything nowaday?
cause i don't even feel that you care.
i don't want everything to be based on my assumptions.
i want assurance from you.
can i?

i wish you would tell me you will always care for me.

oh.. crappy day.
some freaky things happened.
regretted taking pictures.
whatever.

hais.
i have been feeling so guilty the whole day.
many things happened.
don't wish to talk about it also larhs.

today isn't very much interesting as well.

had geography for the first 2 lessons.
nothing much.
after that was chinese.
thanks to yiyan, jiewei and janus.. my entire bar of fruitips was only left with one.
this was what happened.

yan: eh shan! i wan tang. i wan sugar.
me: (gives him one.)
wei: eh. i wan glue.
me: huhs? what glue?
yan: eh! you very noob lehs.
me: whatever la. what's glue?
yan: sweets in chi is tang. tang is sugar. sugar is starch. starch is glucose. shortform for glucose is Glu.
me: what lame theory is this man.
yan: eh! i wan sweet!
yan: come over to my sit and bugs me for it.
me: (refused to give while arguing with bobby and banging my pencil box on the table.
Janus: (comes and sits behind me)
me: (was a nice person. gave one sweet to him.)
yiyan still continues to bug me.
the reason why i don't wanna give yiyan is that..
he will finished the entire bar very fast.
i was wrong in the sense that. yiyan isn't the only one.

janus: shan! i wan one more.
me: (copying chinese stuffs from the board, so i threw the whole bar to him.)
janus: (he takes ONE AT A TIME) and!..
janus: eh! yiyan, jiewei! u all want a not.

obviously they will want lar.
ended up left only one for me.
and jiaqi took it during co.
awww!

luckily fadli gave me sweets during DnT!
hahas!

after recess had DnT.
crapped around with mubarak and fadli with heather.
really crap.
and we waited for them outside boys toilet.
all of us were late for english lesson!
yay!

english was dumb.
wasn't even reading or whatsoever.
somehow.
managed to get away with it.
3 periods of her.
whatever.
the last thing we did was to say out the class cheer.
kinda like it yeah!

waited for sengie, jessie, lena and jiaqi.
went down for mass meeting.
some dumb people messed up the place by throwing eggs, steal things, ransacked the whole place.
and also the bastard who sent the sms.
we know who's the person who sent the message already.
seriously bastard lors!
bo liao.

went for co.
didn't go for the damn meeting for this friday the sec1 ptm.
now, i'm not involved.
it's okay lar.
maybe can go see things with jiaqi if she's free~

jialat.
first test of the year. MATHS
tomorrow.
scared sia.

just hope i'll do well.
peace((:

someway somehow,
i'm enjoying being emo now.
whatever.

today didn't do anything much at all.
first 4 period marathon of english again.
sian-ed.

after recess was chinese.
had to do gong han the format.
whatever~

followed by social studies& maths.
nothing much since they were single periods.
after which was assembly.
total crap!

first was about AEM.
then some stupid carevolution people came.
and talked crap.
then was the video was 2 batch ago's sec3 camp.
dots man.

after assembly chiong go ava room for co meeting.
talk crap as usual.
after everything,
went long john with jiaqi to find weeting& tsz wing.

went home after that.
boring day.

and i still got lots of homework to chiong.
mainly DnT.
fuck sia.
nevermind.

you are right.

if i think that we are already talking very little,
what's gonna come in sooner or later this year is much worser than what we expect.
if i'm angry cause we haven't been talking?
shouldn't i go and commit suicide when things get worse?

if this is little,
what will happen if you have the other half?
wouldn't you spend more time with them like you always do?
then what's gonna happen?

we can just forget about talking, forget about everything.
just prevent that there wasn't even a beginning.


如果说，我们3或4天没讲到话，我很不开心。
那在这一年里，或晚一点的日子里，我们还会有更多时候没讲话。
我不就要去跳楼自杀了吗？

如果这样算少，那以后等你有你的另一半的时候，
你其不是会像往常那样多陪她多些时间？
那该这么办呢？

那我们就可以把讲话算了，所有事情都算了。
就当成从一开时就没这一回事。

i guess it's really about time i learn how to let go instantly.
not gradually.

people so change.
i agree with that.
they can be saying they don't like them this moment,
and the next moment you see them hanging around together.
):

what the hell.
today is a total tiring day.
practically i didn't sleep?
so yeah.
slack slack around.

went to school and saw many people when we were walking to school.
saw jiewei, jingkai, janus and many others too.
anna had to help me pull up my tie since she say my tie very low.
so whatever.

had chinese lesson.
total crap.
chem.
was in chem lab.
did chromatography in the lab.
mubarak sits beside me and zulfadli sits behind me.

crapping around.
so i took fadli's specs.
then he took out another one.
hahas!
ended up i wear his specs until end of school.
wee~

after school,
went kfc.
saw many people that we don't wanna see.
practically all of them that we saw were people we don't wanna see.
we then went to interchange.
jessie, lena, jiaqi and i took 69.
went temasek poly for the open house.
walked around.

took a fancy for several of them.
saw people cosplaying.
saw bleach, fate stay night and also deathnote.
cool man.
the deathnote de L damn look alike la.

went home soon after that.
come back only see some people buay song.
whatever.

i only know i'm sleepy now and i wish to go and sleep.
i need more sleep!

oh man!
it's like 5.15am in the morning and i'm blogging?
okays.
simply cause didn't sleep larh.

i did doze off few times.
but woke up again.

if only i'm at a chalet.
i'll gladly not sleep.
but i still have school later.
whatever.
lucky later got no boring teacher lessons.
wait!
i jus remembered.
there is el lesson.
oh my god.

gonna doze off during that lesson i guess.

i wish everything goes well today.

hmms.
today was okkay lar.
went up and down up and down many times.
overall.
tired day.
and i still have so much homework that is untouched YET.
and it's already 9pm.
wtf?
nevermind.

well oh well.
school today was okay lar.

had POA.
there was a pretty big bee flying in my class and ms wng was so scared that she screamed and ran to the door there.
we kena shock thought what happened.
hahas.
joker teacher.

after that was PE.
played captain ball with the 3 kg ball.
realised that my class is actually quite fun.

after recess was MATHS.
mr said told as somethings about sec3 camp.
we were supposed to carry out belongings and walk from our school and the way to change campsite.
and it takes approximately 3 hours plus.
good game.

had a lesson of physics and.. hah!
went off for house meeting.
wee~
slacking.

after it all ended,
waited till 2.3o for mass meeting.

got to know what we are incharge of in council camp.
yay!

overall i/c:zhan wei
2nd i/c:jessie.

discipline i/c[s]:
-wei zhou
- baoshan

first-aid i/c[s]:
-lynn
-heather

media i/c[s]:
-agassi
-lena

f&b i/c[s]:
-haimei
-arina

treasurer& welfare i/c[s]:
-sengie
-glenn

games i/c[s]:
-meishan
-wenqiang

logistics i/c[s]:
-dingyang
-weeting

i think thats all.
can't remember already.

anyways.
meeting was fun.
we sang happy birthday song for wei zhou, luqman and yanting.
hahas.
got cake somemore.
then we keep crapping around.
lots of cheering around.
yeah.

then all the sec2[s] and publicity become ambassadors of the school.
lalalas~
anyone interested to be one too? hahas.

oh oh oh..
saturday was a happy day~
but.. it wasn't so in the morning.
it was rubbish in the morning man.
i woke up at suddenly at 6am thinking that it was friday.
need chiong go school.
cause it was 6.25am already.
den when i was it the toilet.
i stand there. and i came out.
cause i realised it was saturday.
how dumb. =.=

got woken up by a phone call at 11plus.
supposed to meet kaijing.
i though it was only 9am.
i think i got the timing all mixed up.

nevermind.
around 1.50 all the things start going wrong.
very wrong.
jiewei told me he's not meeting us at 2.30
janus said he will go by himself later.
can't get yiyan.
ahh. it only went right after janus said he could make it.
clarence called me. then we talked about what to do later while i was packing my bag.
met with sen, lena, jiaqi, clarence& janus at the mrt station.
went vivo.
the first place we went was pet safari.
the dogs were so damn cute man.
the hamster was so small so cute.
slacked around after that.
went starbucks.
jiaqi and i shared the chocolate ice-blend with chocolate chip.
nice. some people was so emo throughout the whole thing.
it made me a bit bu shuang for some reasons.

the way clarence plays the guitar damn funny sia.
he just looks funny.
yiyan joined us.
wee~ we wanted to play with the water at the roof top there.
but the was poo in the pool.
so we decided not to.
just in case we step on poo[s].

slacked around here and there.
when we were in the book store, clarence sabo me.
he told jiaqi to follow me later to buy the cake.
so jiaqi followed me around everywhere i go in the book store.
damn cute man.

janus and i played happy slapping while yiyan send sengie to outram mrt station.
wahlao.
i kena slapped on the hand many times.
thanks to janus's "professional way" of playing.
i got alot of extra slaps on the hand too.
thanks to jiaqi and clarence.
each time i lose to janus, i will kena slapped 3 time.
by janus, clarence and jiaqi. =X

i played till hand swollen.
hahas!

me, jiaqi and clarence wanted to look at the cakes.
but have to do it secretly as though we are theives or sth.
jiewei came at about 7plus.
we went to toast box.
drank ice lemon tee.
they ate the bread.
kinda cute.
they cute the bread into 9small cubes.

went to kopitiam and ate dinner.
the food was sucky?
then clarence realised that my 4th finger was very red.
hahas.
i didn't even realise that.
it was red cause got 1 time janus hit my hand that time, he "forgot" to open up his palm.
he smacked my hand with his knuckles.
.....

we went to the rooftop after dinner.
i went down to buy the cake.
it was a chocolate cake.

when i went up, asked jiewei and yiyan to come out and help me light the candles.
we had a hard time lighting them thanks to the strong wind.
end up janus saw us lighting the candles.
=.=

the lighter damn hot lar.
jiewei and i tried until hand very pain.
ouch. =O

played some bashing.
not as much as jason's birthday one.
fun though.

when clarence tried to smash jiaqi with the cake, clarence turned and wanted to run.
but.. banged into a grandmother.
and she "flew".
opps.
then the grandmother over there blah blah blah.
whatever.

went home soon after that.
while we were on the train,
played happy slapping with jiewei for a while.
but couldn't take it already.

after that they started talking about trapping a girl with their hands.
it looks abit..
hmms.
like wanna do sth to her like tat lar.
then we were joking around.
clarence tried.
he is keep slamming the train the behind there.
will make the girl chua dio man.
i got a shock from it.
i like jiewei's style of doing it.
silent yet fast.
right in front of your face.
hahas! so damn funny!

reached home at almost 11.
no one was at home.
slacked around lors.

thats all.
i know i should have posted this post long ago.
but kept it as a draft and didn't post lors.
yeahyeah.

oh fuck off bastard.
you don't deserve to be living in this world.
you should just burn in hell.
what rights do you have to say others man.

i hope the next time you find a girlfriend.
and ask her.
are you a secondhanded girl?
i hope the girl will slap him across his face.
kick his dick and make you no father's day.

and this is to a particular fucking bitch.
don't mess with her.
i swear you won't be of enough status to play with us.
whatever you not happy with.
come and find us lar.
and i'm warning you.
you better not say anything else.
or u'll regret it.
we don't give a damn about your great connections in school.
they mean nothing to me.
just don't fuck with us.
you'll regret dearly.

so what if my studies are as good as yours.
so what if you do better in cca than me.
so what if the teachers have a good impression of you?

too bad.
boo man!
thats cause i'm smarter than you in other ways.
thats cause i don't give a fucking damn about the cca.
thats cause i'm not a mother fucking teacher's pet adn sucking up to them.

and there is one thing that i have that you definitely don't have.
i have true friends.
i have real friends.
i have friends who will stay by my side when i'm unhappy, sick, sad or whatever. even when i'm in trouble.
unlike you.
you are just jealous of her.

at the very least, when i'm unhappy i know they can be there for me always.
Qi,Len,Jess,Shan,Jan,Jie,Yan.

be jealous and fuck off.
i don't give a damn about how you feel.

lalalas!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JANUS!

YOU ARE OFFICIALLY 15th ALREADY.
HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE CELEBRATION.

wee~

oh girl.
i remembered i promised to be there whenever you need someone.
so how can i possibly be angry with you?
i have never got really really angry with anyone of you.

as you said.
no one wants the FAM to split up.
so try and resolve any misunderstandings among ourselves.
we remember that we promised to stay by each other.

without you, the world seems to be full of boredom everywhere.
lesser screams, lesser shoutings.
and that definitely NOT a good thing.

&& i really hope you will go on saturday okays?

argh.
crap.
didn't go to school today.
cause i'm having a very bad headache with fever and all the other crappy stuffs.
whatever larhs.

just remembered i forget to blog about somethings yesterday.
we were having lunch in school ytd.
with jiaqi, lena, baoshan, jessie and sengie.

then justin came along.
ALONE.
so we heard sengie and jessie talking about perverts.
then justin asked.
justin: "ehh. how does a pervert behave like arh? i never encountered before leh"
lena: "oh.. u are now hanging around with 1.2.3.4.5.6 perverts."
justin: "... what the hell la"

nevermind.
then remembered seeing this on sengie's blog.
the way how mrs _____ says one..
she say.. one ee twoo
whatever.

so when justin was buy his food from the malay stall.
i went beside him and..
me: "justin"
him: "wad?"
me: " one ee"
him: "wah lao eh! what the hell man!"
me: laughs away.

nice to disturb justin uh?
and according to lena, justin is almost as disgusting as yiyan when they eat.
cause he spits the fishball back lena calls him.
eeww..
what the hell.

i looked at justin with the disgusted look when he offered me a new fishball.
hahas.

went to tm and met sengie and jessie.
sengie was finding people with either amaths or emaths book.
abit blur bout why she wants it larhs.

lalalas...

i am so dead tired!
i'm in a super terrible state.

having a fever, sore throat, flu, cough and a spliting headache.
and when my hand rub each other, i feel as though there is pins poking my hands.
damn pain larhs.
but i seriously don't know whats' going on.

i must be crazy this morning to actually go to school.
i could have just stayed at home.
nevermind.
went to school.
had poa and the rest is just total crap.
my head was just freakin' hell pain.
the feeling just sucks.
recess.
took from drinks uncle 2 panadols.
serious.
if i don't take it.
the rest of the lessons will be hell.

maths was alright.
i missed what mr said was saying.
so he explained to me again.
he's a nice teacher. REALLY.

after which was physics.
i was at the verge of falling asleep.
the bell came just in time.
chemistry.
one word. fun.
i guess that the only lesson that we can joke ard in our own class other then my chinese.
lalalas~

my _____ came back after school ended.
we were supposed to show him the worksheet.
thought that let him mark can already.
who knows.
he came and stayed on for 30mins.
scolding us.
crap larhs
a few of us the phones keep ringing.
my phone was one of them.
whatever.
damn du lan.

went canteen and mum mum.
went tm after that.
walked many rounds around.
finally decided on it.
then was deciding its size.
bought it at last.
xDD

it's with meee~!
lalalas.
went home soon after that.

from ther period of after recess to finish shopping with lena, jiaqi and shan,
my headache was alright.
but when i got home.
the headache came back again.
guess that was the effect of the panadol i guess.
whatever.

i think i'm off to sleep.
i'm very tired.
and usually when i decide to take afternoon naps, is when i'm sickkk..
T.T

aww~
who will save me?

&&i just want a hug.
a real one from you.

argh.
broke broke broke.
seriously arh.
i wonder how on earth i spend my money.
they seem to be running out easily uh?

looks like i have to owe the pressie first bahs.
:S
sorry~

somehow.
i feel that things are no longer the same anymore.
we seem to be going different ways.
everything don't seem to be nice.
not as how they used to be.
sigh..
whatever it is larhs.
it is not as though it is within my means.
should anything go in the wrong way.
i no longer have any say i guess.

nothing seems the same since the start.
no even the people themselves.

oh crappppp!
i haven blogged for donkey years already man.
so..

many things have happened.
don't think i can blog in detail since some were passed pretty long ago.
so shall just type whatever i can remember.
have been going out with jasmine everyday until school reopen-ed.

2odec- went out [i forgot where]
21dec- went to school for "training" by mrs willman.
22dec- went to school for sec1 registration.

saw yiyan,jiaqi & nicholas's brother[s]

23dec- went esplanade to watch "Hong Lou Meng" concert.

24dec-26dec- chalet at coasta sands pasir ris.

27dec- i can't remember. i only know i went out.

28dec- P.O.E.M workshop in school.

29dec- orientation preparation.

30dec- can't remember either. only know i went out too.

31dec- uh hah! countdown at pasir ris park & also to celebrate jason's birthday.

totally fun.

o1jan- i'm a good girl. i stay at home. xD

o2jan- went out. went marina. watched deathnote and sang kbox.

o3jan- the hell reopens. sec1 orientation.

o4jan- still hell. still orientation.

o5jan- the hel continues. the bloody orientation continues. went to grand hyatt to stay. i fell asleep while waiting.

o6jan- checkout. walked around orchard. went home to change in the night. watched "Zhong Ji Yi Ban" until 5am. drank bacardi breezer. xDD

o7jan- went back hotal to get my house keys. i left it there. :S went velocity as well as ang mo kio dere.

o8jan- back to hell.

ARGH!

how many days of hell do i have to suffer?

sobs.

reached school pretty late~

:S

everything was pretty okay until the last 3 periods.

3 freaky periods of english

awww...

waited for lena, jessie and sengie after school.

lalalas~